I will say this, and I have said it before on this topic. This discussion is really a English thing.
I think in most of the world, there is no conflict between the two. It is an honour for player from your team to play on the national team, and when they are not selected people complain. Now there is a bit of a double standard on my part, because I am happy that Boateng did not represent Ghana in the African Cup, as Milan needs him in the CL and Serie A.